Hello friends! Here I am again with another episode of Hanasakeru Seishounen. Sorry it’s been so long. In this episode we continue to plumb the bizarre depths of Eugene’s suicidal tendencies and Kajika’s…attachability? Li Ren is pissed at Eugene and locks Kajika up to keep her from seeing him, some weird business stuff is going down in Malaysia, Eugene plots to get Kajika out, Li Ren sets the entire NYPD on them, Eugene is an exceedingly sad panda, Li Ren calms the fuck down, Kajika goes to Paris. There’s your summary. For bitchin’, continue on.
The episode begins with Li Ren, having expressed his opinions on Emo Guy Eugene, respecting Kajika’s judgment by locking her in her room. Yeah…Li Ren is kind of being a dick, but Eugene gives Kajika alcohol and also is frequently attacked by hysterical people with guns. I can kind of see his point. Kajika is outraged, but can’t do much about it, being a weak li’l girl. Li Ren orders Tsao (that Fang dude who called Li Ren “supple”…hee hee) to dig up some more dirt on Eugene so that Li Ren can prove that he isn’t one of the men chosen by Harry Burnsworth, and stomps off. Kajika and Toranosuke both reflect on how pissy Li Ren is acting; Kajika recalls that there was only one other person Li Ren acted like this about, and that was Mustafa. Okay, we get the point, even if Kajika doesn’t: Li Ren is jealous of people Kajika likes. These are two pretty different situations, though. 1) Mustafa did not drive women to suicide (THAT WE KNOW OF! personally I am pretty suspicious). 2) Li Ren just got a little sulky around Mustafa. He did not totally fucking flip out like he has been doing basically since Eugene appeared. Oh well, the point is Kajika doesn’t get it. Anything. Basically.
While everyone else is off doing serious things, Eugene is busy seducing the Burnsworths’ maids.
…yes. While he’s doing that, Li Ren is doing some actual work. Tsao comes in to tell him that some kind of something or other that we again do not care about is going down and he’d better get his ass to Malaysia to deal with it. All righty! Well, it sort of does interest us a little bit this time, because the next scene shows us Fang Tongsen (Li Ren’s uncle, who would seem to be a bit of a Claudius) plotting to undermine Li Ren and the Burnsworths with the help of…….
ZOMG! The plot thickens! Well, it’s still not very thick. At all. Anyway, we don’t know yet whether Bachelor #3 knows what Tongsen’s plans are, but either way we’re left with the knowledge that there’s some kind of grudge against the Burnsworth Corporation for its rise to prominence from obscurity twenty years ago, and that Tongsen puts way too much sugar in his coffee. Look, guy, you are at an age where you probably should start worrying about Type 2 Diabetes. Also, plotting is bad for your cardiovascular health.
Here’s where the episode gets kind of entertaining. Fucking with Li Ren is apparently important enough to Eugene to make it worth it to suborn a maid and get her to sneak in a note to Kajika with her dinner, and later trip the circuit breaker so Kajika will have a chance to get out of the house and run away with him. Haha?! I like this note, by the way:
“Dear Kajika, The electric power will go off right on midnight tonight. Within two minutes bfore the private power generates, please come to the east gate. Mustafa.”
One: Eugene’s texting habits are apparently beginning to affect his notewriting. Two: HAHAHAHAHAHA HE SIGNED IT MUSTAFA. OH GOD. Well, to his credit, he does know exactly how to lure Kajika out!
So the power is cut, and this causes Kajika’s door to become unlocked. I don’t know how. Toranosuke gets said door slammed open into his face (I really don’t know why he hasn’t been fired yet) and runs to Li Ren (whose teatime was most cruelly interrupted) to report Kajika’s escape. Kajika, with a certain moronic glee, runs between two security personnel and begins to climb a fence; when they try to pull her down, she sets the guard dogs on them. That’s really not very cool, Kajika!
Eugene picks Kajika up in his smexy convertible; Kajika waves happily like an idiot and promises an enraged Li Ren that she’ll be back soon. Toranosuke reports that all their cars’ tires have been punctured. Holy crap…Eugene really planned this thing. The Burnsworths must have an assload of cars, which means that Eugene must have a veritable army of boxcutter-wielding midget ninjas! O__O
So Li Ren sets every government organization he possibly can on their trail, but it’ll take awhile to track them down. What is Eugene going to do with Kajika now that he’s seduced her away from that angry, angry Chinese man? Well, go to some awesome gigantic castle-y house and sit around talking about how emo he is, of course! Oh Eugene -_-
Long story short: Kajika confronts Eugene about all those women he made, y’know, kill themselves; Eugene says that the women he dates are pushy and annoying and that sometimes he just happens to accidentally suggest that they die. Nuh-uh! says Kajika. I bet you give them the choice of killing themselves or you! Eugene does not deny it; Kajika asserts that he’s just waiting for someone to appear who will kill him, and wonders sadly why he doesn’t want to live. Eugene does the emo smirk for awhile longer:
…and again insinuates that Kajika is going to use her family’s money and power to get what she wants from him. It is beginning to seriously sound like Eugene thinks Kajika wants to keep him as some kind of reincarnated leopard gigolo. What the fuck is going on here? Anyhow, Kajika again denies that she would do something like that, and somehow segues into a story about how it would get stormy on her island sometimes and no one could get in or out and she thought she could die for Mustafa. …. Kajika, you’re totally crazy. But this appears to have an impact on Eugene, because the music is all touching and there’s a zoom-in on his surprised face and we can just see the cracks in the cold, hard armor of his heart beginning to widen. OH ;O;
Just then, two of Eugene’s (not at all jewel-shiny) brothers burst in and lambast him for continually doing shit that is hard to cover up (presumably referring to Hysterical Suicide Lady from episode 2). Eugene says some vague stuff about his birthday and about being suicidal. The brothers bitch him out, Kajika defends him; the brothers notice her for the first time, and upon finding out that she’s Kajika Burnsworth, freak out, because Eugene’s never fucked up the life of someone who actually mattered in the business world before. And well they might freak out, because just then every single police car in New York (and maybe the world) zooms up to Old Castley Mansion de Eugene. And a fleet of helicopters. A FLEET OF HELICOPTERS.
Kajika is about to go talk Li Ren down when he comes in himself, very, very angry…but I guess Kajika’s sort of standing protectively in front of Eugene works, because Li Ren and all those cops let him just walk away, and he immediately fucks off for Paris for some reason I don’t really care to remember. It probably has something to do with him becoming the head of the Vorkan Corporation upon turning twenty. Anyway, Kajika yells at Li Ren and then goes home and sulks. Li Ren asks her if she loves Eugene, and she says that she does, but that she doesn’t know what kind of “love” it is. Li Ren finally grows the fuck up and tells her to go to Paris to figure it out.
The episode ends with Kajika arriving…somewhere in France…in search of Eugene. Meanwhile, Li Ren finds out, through his investigation, that Eugene cannot be Vorkan’s real son…! DOOM DOOM DOOM.
So…okay. Kajika is chasing after her fixer-upper, Li Ren is trying desperately to juggle his responsibilities as a businessman and his issues with Kajika’s husband-finding game and not doing too well with either, Eugene is planning to suicide it up, Toranosuke is useless as usual, a new pretty boy will probably be revealed soon, and some business dudes be plotting shit against everyone we (are supposed to) like. I wish I could say that there was some exciting ridiculous stuff going on, but it all seems to be business-related You know something’s wrong when you start kind of wishing that someone was cheating on someone else who got knocked up by their secret lover who is actually a long-lost sibling. But you have to admit that if Hanasakeru Seishounen had that plot – minus Kajika – that it would be pretty awesome.